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Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Hard worker


The morning delighted us with such a beautiful sunshine, In our way to the UCL Hospital myself decided to just enjoy and contemplate the view that an upper deck of a London bus always can offer for just 1£ ticket. And today the value was definitely worth. From the seat even if not in a window seat I could notice the progression of the Autumn in the city. The 45 degrees shadows cannot be mistaken, the festival season has gone. And the trees with a different composition, the yellow and pallid green starts to take over of the each branch of the tree. Since ever the arriving of the Autumn has a very strong effect in my mind, It means the start of new life without commitment with the year before, If not, It is now that the school starts, the normal pattern backs to the works, the most of the cinemas come out waiting to explore the Christmas and also now the chemotherapy starts to be effective.

Therefore the relaxed way it showed providential as the supreme aim of the trip. I was not alone, I was carrying one with me somewhere close to my pockets not only my bus pass but also few millions of sperm specimens that I voluntary wanted to keep and store in a freezer shelf for the future. When we arrived in the Fertilization centre my best dreams and fetishes dropped straight to the floor, instead of an idyllic place where your mind with be permanently solicited by sexy and images of the sin, it was a small place in the lower ground floor with a sterile tiny area to wait and a also a very bright narrow long corridor that would take you to the main room where the patient got their own interview with the staff. In between was hidden the rooms of the sacred pleasure.

But lets take this by stages, the interview it would be dramatic and surreal for a common person, but I admit that nowadays nothing is surprising me anymore. Thus, I faced a story that I would have read in a newspaper some years ago. I agreed for the conditions of the storage, the aims going further than just keep and have the ability to reproduce in vitro a new human being but overall to give permission to my partner to manage the deposit after my death. This is something that we never discuss and there is no need.

After the long paper work, started the best part, I was called to the depraved pleasures room. I was with all the appetite before I got inside, And to make sure that there will not be a problem I ask to the doctor if my wife could accompany me for such a job, He said: yes of course, without any smile (professional people). So we dived together in the room. But, when I got in I felt very disappointed, the place looked like just a toilet converted to a sperm donation room. I was so angry. Such a place should deserved a more attention and money from the authorities. I had sensation of misplaced, In the small room the light were so strong that would dazzled the best try to explore our wonderful brain and the white walls naked of any illusion to the pleasure did not allowed me to forget all the plastic situation that we were facing. I would say they only worried about the functionality rather than the selfishness pleasure. There were two plain chairs wrapped in a long toilet paper, bin and a sink to finish the performances.

After some co-work I ended up with my generous donation in a small bottle, that I handled to the doctor. Afterwards I was guided to a blood collection award to be taken a sample and tested to HIV and other forms of Hepatitis. Finally I went back to the Lower ground floor to discuss the quality of the sample, already monitored and studied in the microscopy. The good news is the fertile sperm is still in reasonable proportion, half of a normal person, something as 10.000 per 1 millilitre, and they still move OK, but again slower than a normal person. The bad news is that I still need to go back to the Fertility centre, because they store 6 units and they want to store for 5 years 8 units.

Today it was the good morning that turns in a bad afternoon, In the afternoon started some pain in my abdomen, around Liver, Pancreas and Stomach. For now I will wait for Friday to speak with Dr Keplin, This might be symptoms of the chemotherapy.
Kisses from the size of the World

2 comments:

Maria Rosália said...

Olá Helder
Fico contente por ti, pois hoje já me pareces mais optimista. Sabes que vais ter dias bastante dificeis com altos e baixos.Mas como disse um teu amigo, "depois da tempestade vem a bonança" e este ditado é mt antigo, mas sempre actual.
Força amigo
Beijinhos

Anonymous said...

Foi um dia muito bem passado!O bolo que fiz e´que nao saiu la muito bem...
Beijinhos Helder, Justa e Olivka!!!

Miriam