Thursday, July 31, 2008


Some of the tranquillity that I am feeling presently comes from my early decision to accept the cancer without too much drama, like suddenly I would have another member in my family.

Also, I do not want to spend too much energy with revolutionary process, I just want to battle it peacefully.

Corridor of the Hope

Sometimes, we are looking for so much in our life and we found that the most beautiful and pleasant things are just everywhere, Almost all the time in front of you if not chasing you,

bye dear all

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Summer Holidays 2008

What a wonderful day I had today. Morning I went to the Royal Free Hospital, to do a few scans. The MRI - Magnetic resonance imaging (consists in shaking all the molecules of your body and after taking pictures of your tissues, essential to catch some tumours and inflammations) and the CT scanning – computed tomography (using the XR technology). Fortunately I could do both in the same day using only one fasting day, brilliant :) After, I confirmed my Octreotide Scan for next week.
You probably notice already my idea of wonderful day.

I come home on time to eat and have my rest, as all my energies runs out in the morning. Afternoon is due to relax, read, Olivinha, and computarizing meaning investigating a lot of hours to write here :)

Some other bites of good news are that when I started my hospitalisation I weighted 62kg and now I am with 67kg. So the mums’ food apparently is helping to put on some weight. The Dr Caplin did say that as much more strong and fit I am better prepared to the chemo I will.

Also to note that the pain in my back in spite of still around it has not increased and I hope it keeps like that until my crucial appointment in 15th August. Having pain is always my biggest panic. I have been rejecting to take painkillers, unless they prescribe me cannabis :)

Just now it starts to rain in the London night, I can predict with 110% that it will last for a several days, And good night dear friends

Saturday, July 26, 2008


Well, it is Friday afternoon and looks like I survived at the most expected appointment of my live. In fact after today I have reasons to feel much more confidant.

The doctor looked very professional and was very patient and calm when he listened all my endless list of questions. Actually, Justyna was censuring me because I looked as the doctor and the doctor looked as a patient. I was with my legs crossed and a tea in the top of his table. I was with a long speech about my journey so far and doubts and I made sure that I would end the entire list. So, several times I told him to do not interrupt me until I finished my ideas.

Afterwards I let him take his position as a doctor, He introduced him self as a specialist for a weird and unknown diseases. Therefore, is where the Neuroendocrine belongs. It is a very unusual kind of cancer, unknown the origin, probably find easily in uncommon people :)
He stressed that in spit of the rarity of the incidence of this tumour (only 2% in all range of tumours are this type, what is less then 1,000 cases in all U.K. every year) it normally presents lower pace in its growth compared with the classical cancer in the pancreas. Additionally, the advantage to me when I choose to have this cancer is they have a several chemicals to fight the Neuroendocrine (short NETs) and normally the people reacts better to the chemotherapy given. Big percentage of this tumour tends to stagnate or decreases after the treatment.

So, positive in this:
Slower growth
More treatment available
Possible to jump to other treatments if one medication does not work

Still harmful, can kill

For the first time the doctors mentioned the chance to have an operation, either in the beginning or after the chemotherapy, the surgery will aim to remove the cancer and could be needed remove big part of the liver and pancreas. But to be in safe side, the need to check and investigate other parts to make sure that the cancer did not spread to these parts of my body. I hope that some pain I have in my chest and stomach is only anxiety and nervous.

It was positive to witness all the care from the doctor to my claims because all the doctors before were always reducing and neglecting other possibilities.

In the next three weeks I will be put forward to:
Special blood test, Hormone profile, to find if the cancer releases some special hormones
CT Scan and MRI to in detail study and better understand the extension of the cancer in all organs.
Another test is in the nuclear department, the Octreotide, I will need to be submitted to radiation that will study also behave of my hormones. For this I will need to be in hospital for two days.
And lastly, the common endoscopy that will see if there are metastases in the digestive system

All this it will be done until 15th of August, day that I will meet again Dr Caplin and also Dr Tim Meyer, the last doctor is responsible for the chemotherapy. At this date they will tell me if I go to chemotherapy or firstly I will visit the surgery unit.

My attitude is day by day, and then today is a good day, even if I still need sleep more 21 days with a sentence that I refused to accept in my head, I felt so much hope in the words of the doctor.
Until two weeks ago the doctors that come around have been telling me that in this cases statistically my hope for live normally would not going further than 6 months. Today the doctor put far away this scenery :)
Viva o fim-de-semana e a vida também

Thursday, July 24, 2008

ola meus amigos.

Pois amanha vou pela primeira vez ver o oncologista ao Royal free, Dr Caplin. Como devem imaginar estou um pouco ansioso. Ja tenho uma lista de pergunstas para lhe por, se bem que algumas das respostas nao tenho a certeza se as quero saber :)....

Mas tambem sei que nao tenho outra hipotese se nao ir para o tratamento, nao ha volta a dar. Sinto O neurodocrine(uma palavra nova para mim e suponho que tb para a maioria de voces. Variante do Cancro no Pancreas, relacionado essencialmente com disfuncao do pancreas originado pelas malditas hormonas) a incomodar-me nas costas (onde o pancreas mora) e á volta do figado.
Creio que me vao por para a Quimioterapia, visando reduzir e queimar o mais possivel do Temor.

Já agora espero imitar o meu colega de Hollywood Patrick Swayze, que ja anda por ai, feliz da vida.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Estava a pensar explicar o porque deste titulo "Licoes para a vida", mas decidi explicar mais tarde

ola amigos, time to go for a walk with my Justa and Olivinha.

I just now come from my little walk. For the first time we could fell the summer, OLivia laying down on the grass with her mum paramounting reading a book. Meanwille je opted to sat on the bench and reading some portugueses magazins left over by some friends.

Before anything there will be a time that I would prefer to write in English others I will escape in Portuguese depending from esprit