Thursday, October 2, 2008

Chemotherapy-Session 1

Ola Bom dia.

What I did not expect in the first Chemotherapy hangover day is to be betrayed by the energy that feeds the Wireless of my computer at home. Come on, it would be more reasonable to find my self without energy but, be let it down by the electricity is completely not understandable. In this World the Human Race still the strongest link. So, with this I found excuse to go to bed earlier and not posted nothing here. Just now come an idea to my mind, it might had been a divine intervention, telling me tonight you must go to bed earlier.

Yesterday, in the verge to start a busy day in the Hospital, I woke very happy or better already drugged but by the adrenaline and whatever other hormones, This was even more surprisingly for me as I was fasting since the night before. The fasting of food and drinks was due to a blood testes to check the Hormones profile. The regular check of hormones is related to the fact that the Neuroendocrine is a Cancer born with a degeneration of some hormones. Therefore, I presented in the Hospital at around 8.15 in the Royal Free to give the last kick-off in the undesirable hosts of my Liver. But the biggest time come around 10.00 when I walked through the Chemotherapy suite, as they called. I climbed a long not very pronounced ramp, with some small rooms on the sides, and ended up in a big room full of light, it looked like Heaven, at least as I like to imagine it. Sunlight coming from all the windows, an adequate classical music that spread quietly but reinvigorating through all the big room. The Hall was full of people, I could see few getting massages to relax, Impressive lively space. I hope Justyna will not read this bit, but the good atmosphere that we found was also helped because the massive presence of Ladies in the ward, Apparently Wednesday is the day were the biggest percentage of patients are women with Brest Cancer. I liked to see, they looked so supportive for each other.

Wherever you go around there was always a smile and a Good Morning with eye contact (here there is no room for that English cliches "I am not too bad" or "I am fantastic", I presume the nurses would kill you if commit that offend and tell something like that :)

The ceremonial in the Chemo ward started with the remembering of why I was there (what I was not pretty sure), if I was aware of all the side effects. After all my agreements I was ready to be inserted the drip in my veins, something that I suppose the veins were excited and could not wait to swallow all the chemicals and transport it to the right place. Probably I also need to instruct them were I want all the chemicals :) I am trying to bend my body, also sleep to the right inside, the Liver side :) There are tricks that one day I will announce to the Medics World.

In the beginning it was given to me a first strong anti-sickness to avoid vomiting, nausea and lack of appetite. But there is not "Bela sem senao"(all has a collateral effect), because, true avoids me to feel sick but make my sugar levels climbed to the top, not giving mercy to my diabetes and then bringing all the headaches. The phenomena happens because this anti-sickness are very reach in steroids what has also sugars.

In the middle of my long shift I had time to taste a lovely meal made of pasta and seafood, that Justyna brought me from downstairs. It taste so good and special I want to think it was also because of the mixing of the Metal taste that this treatment brings up :)

But the afternoon when we were looking for some distraction, to divert my sight from the perfusion of drugs that were been setting for me, I committed an infant mistake, unforgivable one, I packed a movie to watch but I did not realised that the case was empty of CD, I still hope that the drugs would be more reliable than me :) After this course accident I adopted a more prosaic attitude, just relax, listening the beautiful music that surrounded us and just contemplating the moment, within the company of my friend Sun stalking in my left inside already in its setting moment . The anguish mixed with quietness and loneliness could also be refreshing and energetic.

By the time of the last drug the day become almost night, it was almost 7.30 pm. I been left already alone in all award, only it was around a very lovely nurse, that needed to extend also his shift because of me. He was not so busy then he could spent some time with me explaining more details about the function of all the process. I been thinking I also should be paid by my long 10 hours shift in Hospital :) I need to complain to the UPC (Union of patients with Cancer)

But fortunately like everything pleasant the unpleasant has also is time to finish, and that time came. My lovely friend Veena, a friend that belongs to the World, come in the end of the day by her car to pick me up and gave me a providential lift until home. Thank you and Congratulations for your birthday day, A lots of kisses from us.

Getting home it was like if I have been playing football all day, tired and with heavy legs, shame to do not know the score right now. To finish in the best way, me and Justyna went for a small walk, it was already 11pm, to refresh, not to freezing, and to keep my tradition. I am trying to do a small walks all evenings mainly after the dinner to help me digesting. Finally the last thing before bed it was to have a shower. In the end of the my cleaning I was in panic I found one single hair out, in my towel. Should I be already worried or not? :)

This morning I am feeling OK, over my expectations so far. Let us wait.

Big kiss


ftavora said...

se era só um pêlo púbico caído na banheira, no worries. acontece-me todos os dias!

Abraço, pal!

PS. happy birthday to sweet Veena.

Anonymous said...

Don´t worry,For sure it fall down afther eating the biscuit, é normal :):):):)

Big kiss to Venna, I offered her a Sun because I felt that she is a real sunshine in her friends live...

margarida said...

Força Helder
Somos muitos, muitos mesmo que estamos em pensamento contigo, a toda hora.
um beijo do tamanho do mundo.
maria joão