Ashes to Ashes

Today we all woke up with a big cloud of dust in our eyes, The weather fruit of the ashes from an Iceland Volcano looked more like the Sueste (SW) in the Algarve, With the Sun covered but with a sensation of humidity in the air. For that or for whatever I felt today completely exhausted, I could bear only the bed, some of the collateral effects from the chemotherapy apparently also arrived only today with Dust. So now it is just a matter of waiting for the cleared up of the airspace.

Sunset

I am finding inspirational the slogans that voluntarily I am surrounded, Consciously or unconsciously is where sometimes I am looking for extra energy. It is with the placard that Sofia and Cristina left in the wall of my room and it is within Olivia's t-shirt.

The days are passing happily boring, in between one soup of letters from Olivia and a reading session, Special this evening reading session with Oli was particularly great, with the sunset in Olivia's room, it was one of that sensations that I could stay there forever. The day was finished with the visit of Shubhy, Tom and Tazz. Great time.

Placebo?

For the day after chemotherapy I was not too bad, even I was courageous enough to refuse today to have any anti sickness and other medicines that I have been prescribed, I know that my normal protocol of 3 drugs have been reduced to 2 due to the International laboratory which was suppose to supply the same drug has run out the same drug, so since the last chemotherapy I am not having the full combination. The doctor promised me that I am not having Placebo and I do not have anything to doubt about that, but I am finding the side effects less intrusive since the last session, coincidence perhaps.

This afternoon I caught up the sleeping that I had not have in the night, and when I woke up with kisses from Olivia and I went downstairs I just saw the garden full with beautiful flowers. Lovely job from girls.

Chemotherapy-session 11

I was not too exited approaching the last session, but the Life as the Earth never stops even if it looks static sometimes, there is always something ahead waiting for us, and it is that what I look forward to see it. For now the navigacao é á vista, not looking behind that, in three weeks I will see the oncologist I will know the next step. Now is just relax and having a sleep.

The only thing I will miss in the sessions is my massage that I have been having, Today I had my toes shinning, yesterday I even cut the nails. So I had the perfect legs to be massaged.

Pedantic family

Too early I sang about the Summer arrival, as today the temperature droop few centigrade, but nevertheless because I am stubborn I pass my afternoon in my garden, We had the visit of my artist friend, Bruno and his wife. It was good to have somebody with us to distract my day, to do not get lost is distress and thoughts about my tomorrow's chemotherapy session. Few things I am finding about Olivia, firstly and it is embarrassing me is the fact she knows already some English words that I was ignoring, So she is already teaching me the proper Language, Secondly not often she sees me looking for some and when she decides to help me to found, she straight brings me what I am missing, shoes, keys. And finally she has in her DNA the same as mum and it is in collision with my features, She is a great pedantic baby, She wants to organize everything, Impossible to have different foods mixed, napkin always in her side, never can feel wet or dirty. With this it is better for me to get ready to in the future listen often her reproaches as from her mummy.

Today I am also Polish

Today we woke up with the news of another tragedy that touched the Poland nation, Several people including the President of Poland died in a plane crash, The irony of this it is the fact that the official delegation now all death were going to Russia to celebrate the occasion of the mass murder perpetrated by Stalin, About the end of the Great War the Russian killed almost 22 thousand Polish soldiers in a coward and useless crime in Katyn, Russia. There was who were saying that today Putin would apologise and ask for forgiveness in the Russian's name for these crimes.
Thus, this occasion will become now even more dark in the Historical books. I been following how the Polish people are living this moments and they are very sad, but very close to each other, Today Justyna spoke with all the friends about the disaster, They were all in shock but with a very strong feeling of belonging to the same country. I am in solidarity with all Poland.

I guess a lot of doubts will remain to answer about the circumstances of this accident, but the fact that I heard, Putin been the head of a commission to investigate the accident does not help to address that doubts.

Beach in the garden

Friday means Oncology day, First thing when I arrived I saw a college that been doing chemotherapy sessions with me, straight I realised that something was wrong with him, He looked very distress and in tension and when I approached him I understood from him that He had a call from the doctor to come to see him, apparently they found another lump in his lung, With that I also get very sad and sorry for him, But I still hope that what showed in the scans were something related with the chemotherapy. It is possible. It is weird to know this things about him or about anybody else and after leave them and carry on with my live, We never will know all the suffering behind the moments we chat with this friends. In the other hand today I was so happy when I saw another friend in the Hospital, He probably never noticed on me but I saw him few times in the waiting room and in the chemotherapy session, He has a massive tumour in his face, literally his head has the double size, And I always wanted to start a conversation with him, not for pity but more because I always see him alone and he looked such a nice guy, But what made me happy was to see that he had an operation as he was using a drain in the face, I did not speak with him again but I hope that means good news for him.

Regarding to me also the appointment went as I expected, Dr Tim Meyer said also that unfortunately the results from the chemotherapy were not dramatic, for example the two nodules in the Liver, one shrunk but the other one increased size, but mainly because of the extension of my chemotherapy sessions, It goes already 10 sessions so far, He is afraid that soon I would have serious problems in the nerves, the hands are normally the most affected, its sensibility. Therefore he said that I should do only one more session and after have a rest for few months, unfortunately the rest will be only for me not for the Cancer. Nevertheless he told us that after I should start to have some pills, or instead try other solutions. I will not be left alone.

I do not know how to describe, but nowadays I am already happy with everything that comes from the Oncologist mouth but a apocalypse or a big disaster. So I was in a good mood after at home, For the first day we had our meal out. Even it was the first day with the heaters off. So the Spring is On. Outside I enjoyed to read my book and I am exercising my brain to whenever listen a car passing by to translates as a Sea waves, It starts to work. Soon I will need only sand to be in the beach at home.