Extra hand

Living the life that I never dreamt it is a nightmare that I need to live, but I hope I will get used to, as everything in the Life. I also do not know how to deal with the same Life without living it, so this makes the things easier in the end. Every morning when I wake up fortunately I do not see another choice, it is compulsory to go on through another and another day and that is what I am doing. The advantage in the journey is to have Justyna and Olivia close. Olivia is the extra hand who supports me and looks on me, Whenever she sees me more down she straight gives me a hand or just a look inquiring me why are you like that when you should not, we are all here, and that is very important for me.

As the Spring is coming and we know how important will be for us to have a nice garden, colourful playground for Olivia but also for me, then we with Veena and Krishna went to the garden centre and bought a lot of flowers, plants, herbs. So soon will have a planting session :)

Evening me and Mike went to the football pub to watch Man United, but before we had a fantastic diner made from the the hands of Justa.

Carry on

Today the weather was so lovely, probably for the first time this year the Spring showed her face, I thought I would only have good news. But, it was not completely like that. I had the appointment with Dr Fusai, and I knew I would be told about the results from the last scan. Unfortunately or fortunately the things are more or less the same, the size of the legions are the same as showed in the scan before the chemotherapy, there was not any progression that leave any chance for surgery or to cure. He said I just need to carry on, Again he remembered that I can live with Cancer for long years, The chemotherapy will be used now, but when it will not have more affect I will try other medicines.

I knew I should have brought Easter eggs to the doctor, to have better news.

I am exhausted now, too much pressure and I always expect something more from this appointments that never comes. And from morning all the memories, all the fears are awake.

Bye for now.

Dry Wet Monday

This morning we woke up with a storm wet Monday, something never seen here in the house, After Easter the Polish tradition demands from the first Monday after the Men should splash the Women with water, something like the pagan tradition of Halloween or the Carnival in Portugal. In Portugal we use to have on the top of the water the row eggs and the flour rubbed on the face, at least when I was boy. Justyna did not expect and was surprised when saw the water been thrown to her, But Olivia did not find it very funny and cried. But she one day will understand why this :)

The day was again just relaxing as much as I could, trying to do not think about the appointment tomorrow in the Hospital. Fortunately we had the visit of our friends Veena and Krishna, again the day was leaning at the table tasting food.

The book that is entertaining me at the moment is that work from devil The master and Margarita, I been enjoying the masterpiece of Mikhail Bulgakov but I am just been scare because of the destiny in the book for who faced and challenged Devil and Pontius Pilate, just the disgrace and tragedy. I am sure this book will not be prophetic for me, Because God knows that I never play neither with him or Devil. I just want to be informed.

The sure that I am have about the news from tomorrow is also based in the wonderful news that I received today from Portugal, my friend Ganhao and Nucha had a beautiful baby, Gabriela. I am happy that she and all the family are very good. I hope to see her soon.

Funny Easter

It is always hard to be an expatriated, faraway from home, even more in this festive days, but we cannot complain too much, because of our friends are always around giving us the taste of familyhood, Today was a great day, The house was always full of friends, Myself always liked to be surround by friends and Justyna and special Olivia already knows how good it is to have friends around.

In the morning the family went to the mass, I confess it was the first time I really feel very good and in the highest spirit in the Eucharist, probably for having the family with me, also perhaps because of the priest had a very positive and energetic attitude, even giving chocolates eggs to the kids, and of course me and Olivia were there to pick up our share.

After, almost in lunch time finally we had our big breakfast with all the food blessed in the day before and plus much more food, all divine. In the afternoon we were all so full that we went for a walk to the park, There the grown ups behaved as a kids, with lack of respect for the small ones, just jumping and enjoying the place that should not be for them taking fun. With so much jumping it was Olivia who took us home, The perfect ending of the day was having Tom and Shubhy also with us, Great Easter I had this Year.

Happy Easter

After the Fat Friday today we could have again the taste of the tasty food, but it is tomorrow when all the good food will come to the table, This morning we been painting the eggs according with Polish tradition, and also we took the food in a basket to the church in order to be blessed by the priest. Then tomorrow we can eat the Holly food. I hope all of you could have happy Easter.

Special train station

Olivia had a good surprise today morning, Thomas the tank engine decided to stop in the train station near our house, Its trip to High Barnet was sponsored by a Local Charity that supports kids with Cancer. Of course because Olivia knows very well somebody with Cancer she joined with all commitment and solidarity to the activities in the square, She even bought a beautiful T-shirt advertising the cause of the kids with Cancer.

But, the day of course moved on, and today we have collected few disasters, firstly Justyna who had cooked an inglorious cake, that it did not manage to see the light of the day, and me again trying to do DIY, I just manage to do disasters. Of course always that I touch anything the result is also to forget where I left, So must of my time I pass looking after of the tolls that I never know where are they. Here I think I have the genes of my father.

No more lies

For the first day I will not lose myself in lies, I would like to announce that the Easter Time is just around the corner, and we are doing all the cleaning in our home and patio, in fact I am lying, it is the women in the house who does the cleaning and shinning. I am of course backed in excuses just observing and put one screw there another nail here. The Easter is a important Season for both of us, influenced both by the catholic culture of either countries Portugal and Poland. Olivia will be doubled influenced, anyway I do not know what that means.